UK censorship guide: Season 2

ACT 1
And the end of the intro sequence

During the opening sequence, the flashes of lightning were slowed down.

ACT 1
Grampa tells Homer about Herb

Grampa: She did stuff your mother would never do. Like have sex for money.

ACT 1
Homer vows to find Herb

Bart: So, any ideas where this bastard lives?
Homer: Bart!
Bart: What? His parents aren't married are they? It's a correct word isn't it?
Homer: Well, he's got us there.
Bart: (singing) Bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard!
(Cut to Gas Station.)

ACT 2
Homer and Herb meet for the first time

(Homer and Herb hug.)
Herb: Welcome to my home, brother.
Homer: Holy moley, the bastard's rich!

ACT 2
Homer and Herb meet for the first time

(Homer and Herb hug.)
Herb: Welcome to my home, brother.
Homer: Holy moley, the bastard's rich!

ACT 3
Santa' Little Helper finally understands Bart

(Bart successfully gets Santa's Little Helper to perform for Ms. Winthrop.)
Ms. Winthrop: Oh, you son of a bitch. Good show!

Archived cut: BBC no longer airs the show

ACT 1
Grampa and Jasper watch a McBain movie

Mendoza: Any more new business?
(McBain bursts in with a gun.)
McBain: Only your death.
Mendoza: McBain!
(McBain starts firing, as he shoots down all of Mendoza's associates in a circular motion. A gun falls in front of Mendoza.)

Archived cut: BBC no longer airs the show

ACT 1
Homer vows to find Herb

Homer: I'm going to find my brother!
Grandpa: Yeah, good luck.
(Grandpa turns on the TV.)
(Cut to Simpsons car, on the way back from the hospital.)
Lisa: A long lost half brother, how Dickensian.
Bart: So, any ideas where this bastard lives?
Homer: Bart!
Bart: What? His parents aren't married are they? It's a correct word isn't it?
Homer: Well, he's got us there.
Bart: (singing) Bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard!
(Cut to Gas Station.)

Archived cut: BBC no longer airs the show

ACT 2
Homer and Herb meet for the first time

(Homer and Herb hug.)
Herb: Welcome to my home, brother.
Homer: Holy moley, the bastard's rich!

Archived cut: BBC no longer airs the show

ACT 1
After Marge suggests Bart should get a part-time job.

("Turn, Turn, Turn" by The Byrds begins to play)
Narrator: Me? Get a job? Were they serious? I didn't realize it at the time, but a little piece of my childhood had slipped away, forever.
(music stops)
Homer: Bart! What are you staring at?
Bart: Uh, nothing.
("Turn, Turn, Turn" starts playing again)
Narrator: He didn't say it, and neither did I, but at that moment, my dad and I were closer than we...
(music stops)
Homer: Bart! Stop it!
Bart: Sorry.
(Bart starts drinking, while looking at the audience. "Turn, Turn, Turn" starts playing briefly.)

Archived cut: BBC no longer airs the show