When will I learn? The answers to life’s problems aren’t at the bottom of a bottle. They’re on TV!— Homer
Homer: Welcome to the Internet friend, how may I help you?
Comic Book Guy: I am interested in upgrading my 28.8 kilobaud connection to a 1.5 megabit fiber optic T1 line. Will you be able to provide an IP router thats compatible with my token ring ethernet LAN configuration?
Homer: (long pause) Can I have some money now?
Ralph: I eated the purple berries. Ow..oww...(groans)
Bart: How are they Ralph? Good?
Ralph: They taste like...burning!
Nelson: People, people, let's not blame each other. We all know this Milhouses fault!
Homer: Oh, they have the internet on computers now!
Homer: (on phone) Can't make it in today, Mr. Smithers - I have small pox... well it wasn't wiped out in my house!
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