Ehh, they think they’re so high and mighty. Just because they never got caught driving without pants.— Moe
Bart: You ate my homework? I didn't know dogs really did that.
Mrs. Krabappel: Bart Simpson, you're late. Go fill out a tardy slip.
Bart: But I'm only five... (looks at clock) ten, twenty... forty minutes? That's pretty damn late!
Ralph: I'm going to each chocolate 'til I barf!
Skinner: Oh, licking envelopes can be fun! All you have to do is make a game of it.
Bart: What kind of game?
Skinner: Well, for example, you could see how many you could lick in an hour, then try to break that record.
Bart: Sounds like a pretty crappy game to me.
Skinner: Yes, well... Get started.
Fat Tony: Pick a horse, kid. We're putting two dollars on the third race. Make it a good one.
Bart: Eat my shorts!
Fat Tony: Eat My Shorts? Okay, let's see... wait a minute, you little punk! Eat My Shorts is in the fifth race! I said the third race!
Homer: How much does it pay?
Bart: Thirty bucks a week!
Homer: Pfft, I make more than that.
Wiggum: Fat Tony is a cancer on this fair city. He is the cancer, and I am the... uh, what cures cancer?
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