Alright, let’s not panic. I’ll make the money back by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one.— Homer
Homer becomes a boxer after discovering that he can survive massive blows to the head. However it could all end with the big title fight against Drederick Tatum.
Trying to stand up for Bart, Homer runs into trouble with the parents of Jimbo, Dolph and Kearney. However, despite repeated blows to the head, he is not injured because his thick head absorbs punches from his opponent. Moe realizes this and persuades him to take up boxing.
Although Homer cannot throw a punch, he lets the opponent collapse from being tired of punching him. Soon however, Homer finds himself in a match with Drederick Tatum, the best boxer in the world. Lucius Sweet, Tatum's manager, wants three rounds, and Marge wants Moe to throw in the towel if Homer is in trouble.
During the match Homer finds out that Tatum's punches are to powerful. Homer is in danger of getting hurt very badly, and so Moe airlifts Homer to safety.
Bart: Hey, Lis! Check out this space-age toothbrush.
Lisa: That's an electric nostril groomer.
Comic Book Guy: I would like to return your quote-unquote Ultimate Belt.
Sarcastic Clerk: I see. Do you have a receipt, quote-unquote, sir?
Comic Book Guy: No, I do not have a receipt. I won it as a door prize at the Star Trek Convention, although I find their choice of prize highly illogical, as the average Trekker has no use for a medium sized belt.
Sarcastic Clerk: Whoa, whoa! A fat, sarcastic, Star Trek fan. You must be a devil with the ladies.
Comic Book Guy: I must hurry back to my comic book store, where I dispense the insults rather than absorb them.
Jimbo: Hey Simpson, wanna trade belts?
Bart: Well, not really, 'cause yours is just a piece of extension cord.
Kearney: Hey, dude, he's ragging on your cord.
Bart: (beat up) Hey, dad.
Homer: Looking good, son. Hey! What happened to your belt?
Homer: Son, there's only one thing punks like that understand: squealing. You've got to squeal to every teacher and every grown-up you can find. Coming to me was a good start.
Moe: They called me Kid Gorgeous. Later on, it was Kid Presentable. Then Kid Gruesome. And finally, Kid Moe.
Homer: You know Lucius Sweet?! He's one of the biggest names in boxing! He's exactly as rich and as famous as Don King, and he looks just like him, too!
Marge: Homer, of all the crazy ideas you've had... this one ranks somewhere in the middle.
Dr. Hibbert: You have an absolutely unique genetic condition known as "Homer Simpson" syndrome.
Homer: Oh, why me?
Lucius: Your boy looks a little soft, Moe. You do remember our arrangement?
Moe: Yeah, don't worry, you'll get your three rounds.
Lucius: Stupendous. Because if he goes down before that bell rings, your future's going with him.
Moe: Okey-doke. Future's down the crapper. Gotcha.
Moe: Back when I was Gorgeous everybody wanted a piece of me. But somehow I just never made it to the big time.
Homer: Why not?
Moe: I got knocked out forty times in a row Thhat plus politics, it's all politics.
Homer: Lousy Democrats.
PCode
4F03
Index
8×3
Written by
Jonathan Collier
Directed by
Mark Kirkland
Starring
Dan Castellaneta
Julie Kavner
Nancy Cartwright
Yeardley Smith
Hank Azaria
Harry Shearer
Also Starring
Pamela Hayden
Special Guest Voice
Michael Buffer as Himself
Paul Winfield as Lucius Sweet
Additional Vocals by
Sally Stevens
Aired (U.S.)
Nov 10, 1996
Aired (U.K.)
Nov 24, 1996