Email RSS Feed Twitter Feed I’ve learned my lesson: a mountain of sugar is too much for one man. It’s clear now why God portions it out in those tiny packets, and why he lives of a plantation in Hawaii.Homer

Ralph Wiggum

Name: Ralph Wiggum
Identity: The babyish paste-eater in Lisa's class.

Age: 8
Related to: Chief Wiggum (father), Sarah (mother).

Past loves: Lisa Simpson.

"My cat's breath smells like cat food."

Stupid things he does: Eats paste and crayons, does not brush his teeth, laughs at stupid valentines cards, picks his nose too much.
Is not allowed: To use scissors or turn on the stove.
The happiest day of his life: When the doctor told him he didn't have worms anymore.
Frequently sees: A leprechaun who tells him to burn things.

"Miss Hoover, my worm went in my mouth and then
I ate it. Can I have a new one?"